Apologies…

I’m really sorry that I’ve been so bad at posting stuff this last month or so. It’s been a pretty rough time with revision and exams, appointments and arguments and just generally being in a pretty bad depressive episode. So, sorry about that and I hope you’ve all been keeping well. :)

So, what’s been happening in my life recently? Well, I’ve just got my results for second year…an upper second. I know I should be happy about this and proud of myself for achieving this, yet I’m convinced that nothing less than 100% would have left me content. This perfectionist nature thing is very annoying sometimes.

Other than this, arguing with the one closest to you, if it can be called that (more like being yelled at and crying tbh lol) is kinda hard to deal with. I know every relationship has its difficulties and if you can get through them to the other side it will make you stronger and closer as a couple. And yet, we seem to have more than our share of things which make it hard to be together, between our obsessive personalities and unhealthy habits, his anger issues and my depression and anxiety, it can feel pretty complicated sometimes. But we love each other.

Love is not that happy, butterflies-in-your-tummy feeling you have when you’re first ‘a thing’ and you don’t really know each other that much, but you think you do. Love is not wanting to let each other go, because although it hurts sometimes to be together, you love them despite their flaws, in fact they barely seem like flaws to you. Love is not easy, but it is worth it.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

Sometimes it can be hard to be with someone, sometimes it can even seem wrong, but if it’s meant to be then it will stand the test of time. All you can do is pray and trust in what you feel is best, what you feel God wants you to do because He wants what’s best for each of us.

Again, apologies for the lack of posts and hopefully I’ll be back to posting regularly again soon.

Much love, God bless xoxox

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