Everything has just been too hard recently. I feel so suicidal. I cry more. I hurt myself. I am so anxious and depressed. I am so careful and guarded with what I say, crafting this happy clappy image of myself so everyone thinks I’m fine. But im not fine. I’m so unfine to be honest and nothing seems to be helping.
I have tried. I’ve been in and out of therapy and tried different medications and googled so many things in the hope of finding anything that could help it get better, but with not much luck.
I can have a good week and I feel like everything is getting better and I’m finally improving (yay!). Then I have a really bad month. Let’s take Monday for example. I started crying when I was with my boyfriend and I’m not really sure why…and I went with him weeping (lol xD) to and around waitrose… such fun :p
So yeah you may have some okay days, but when they’re bad, oooh they’re bad. :L
But basically I’m just feeling so depressed and kinda suicidal right now and I don’t know what to do so I’m writing a blog post.
Also I’m really sorry for not posting in ages (not that anyone cares lol my writing’s crap anyways soooo…)
Ah well, take care guys and God bless xoxox