You are so strong! Look at you now, reading this. Who cares if you’re reading it from beneath your duvet after a day of not being able to get out of bed, it doesn’t matter if you’ve given in today and hurt yourself, or gone along with things because of peer pressure, or maybe you weren’t able to get through the day without smoking or drinking or maybe you’re not doing so well with your diet. Perhaps you’re feeling really weighed down with the stress of your work or studies, maybe you’re going through a rough patch with your family or significant other. That’s not great, but you know, it’s okay to not be on top of the world right now. We all make mistakes, we are not perfect and you can’t expect yourself to be. That’s not fair. You wouldn’t expect it of anyone else, so don’t be so mean to yourself.
Be gentle with yourself.
You are not machines! You are not cattle! You are men! You have the love of humanity in your hearts! ~ Charlie Chaplin, The Great Dictator.
If you only knew the way that your friends, your loved ones looked at you when you’re doing something you enjoy and you don’t think anyone is watching. The way they admire you, they laugh with you. How much more they’d admire you if they knew how strong you really are. The bravery, the courage it takes to get through the day.
You should give yourself credit where it’s due, and it is due. You may think you’re doing a terrible job at life and feel like you’re barely getting by. I feel you. I know what it’s like to be so tired of trying to ‘just get through the week’ every. single. week. It’s exhausting isn’t it?
You just want to give up some days because you don’t see what the point of trying is when you’re not actually getting anywhere, making any progress. You are making progress though. You are growing as a person, learning from your mistakes. We all pick up bad habits, adopt unhealthy thought patterns. But that’s just how we cope with life at that time. You are learning about yourself and the ways that you can survive, they may not all be healthy ways, but over time you will learn better ways. Even if it feels like it’s taking forever. You will learn to pick up that phone and talk to someone instead of drinking alcohol to numb the painful feelings; you will learn to talk about how you feel, and put your thoughts into words. Eventually you won’t even think about hurting yourself when you feel like shit, you’ll pick up a pen and write your feelings down on paper instead of picking up that blade and writing them on your skin. You’ll learn to notice your triggers, you’ll realise that it’s so much better to surround yourself with people than to isolate yourself and hide away in your room. It will take time, but if you are dedicated to it you will see results. You will get better. You may be in this rut in your life for a short period of time, you may recover and never fall again, but most likely you will stumble along the way. Each time though you’ll learn something new and you’ll be able to jump up again, fighting stance, ready to give it another shot.
You can’t fight everyday though, it gets tiring. Some people have more stamina, it seems like nothing can get them down, they’re always moving forwards, but try not to compare your journey to theirs. You can only see a snapshot of their life and you have no idea what has brought them to that moment in their life. And they don’t know what you’ve been through.
You are so strong, you’ve survived all that’s been thrown at you so far and although some days you need to stay in bed the whole day, you will be okay. You are so brave and I’m proud of you.
P.S. You have an 100% rate of survival so far!! Keep it up! A** 😘